Thursday, March 29, 2007

One Day At A Time

I have tried to take one day at a time for a long, long time now. Here lately, I am taking it minute by minute. I don't know why but when I really think about it, I know exactly why.
If only I could fast forward to the future or look into a crystal ball. But then again it may scare me so bad that I want to go backwards. Might better just stick to the minute by minute thing.

School for the kids is going really great. We have had a meeting with the Counselor and advised them of the anger issues with the middle boy. They were wonderful. They have a short term and a long term plan that they are putting together. The school will work with us and we will work with them to hopefully get him on track. I am working with each child every day. It may be from their school work (just reviewing) or it may be helping with homework. Today it was riding one of the horses with them. Just quality time that I can spend with each one.

The middle boy has volunteered to help his little brother with spelling words and math. He has also volunteered to help with any lessons that I assign at home. I bought a couple of work books today from the Dollar Store and I thought that the youngest could do just a page or 2 everyday. I really think that this will help him. I also think that it will help the middle boy. By helping his brother he is also refreshing and learning. But the funny thing is this...He has no idea that he is learning. I love that part of it. He is learning patience and how to use a calmer voice and be calmer himself. Only if for a minute or 2. That is what I mean by minute at a time.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Best April Fools Day Tricks

I remember having a boss at one point in my life that pulled the Best April Fools Day Tricks on her office staff. She was a supervisor that was all business, one that when you needed an answer, she would give you one that you could count on. She didn't do much joking around in the office either. I really enjoyed having her as a supervisor because I could depend on her.

But one April Fools Day she let her hair down (so to say). We all came in the office just like any other day. This is what we found and what happened...

The phone rang and when I went to answer it she had simply turned the handset around backwards on the phone cradle. The part that you speak into was now at my ear and the park that you listen from was now at my mouth. I tried to remain calm and not just bust out laughing. The caller wanted to leave a message so I opened my top drawer to find that it had been emptied out completely. I just couldn't hold back anymore, the laughter just poured out. The phone rang again and one of my co-workers did the same exact thing that I did.
Little did we know that the supervisor had pre-arranged some of her friends to call our office.
After a few minutes of lots of laughter in our office everything settled down again. Once it was all settled down, we all began our daily routines. This is what we found...Our supervisor had removed the tape from our tape dispensers, the staples were removed from our staplers, the ink refills were removed from our pens, paper clips were removed from their little holders, adding machines had been unplugged, name tags had been placed on different co-workers desk, the clock had been up an hour and a few other little things here and there.

I am not sure that we found everything that was askew that day. But I know that it was fun and harmless.

Good and Bad

Things go good and then they go bad. It's like night and day sometimes. I am talking about an 11 year old boy. How can he have such moments where he is absolutely perfect and then he becomes so defiant and upset? I am keeping a journal of his anger issues. Not really his anger issues, but times he went to bed a little later or when he expresses how an adult talked to him or anything that might help. If anyone has any ideas, please tell me. I really need it for peace in our home and peace in the childs heart and mind.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

One Week Today

Today makes one week that the boys have been in our home 24/7. Yes we had one bad day...Well only about 20 minutes. But my goodness, if that is all we have out of 7 days, I will certainly take that and not complain.

They all started riding the bus this morning. This was their choice. I was planning on driving them for the rest of this week and let them start riding the bus after their Spring Break. But they ask about the bus and when could they start riding it. So I let them make that decision.

Whistling - The middle boy has been whistling since he moved in. What does it mean? I take it that he is happy, that he feels wanted, that he feels like he belongs here. And he is smiling more every day.

Our House

Needless to say that our house has been turned upside down. Going from no kids to 3 kids and all of them in their pre teens. Maybe for one split second a day I think I have lost my mind. Then I suddenly remember - oh yeah!

We finally got all the boxes out of our living room, kids all registered in school, kids sent off to school and whewwww...what a task it was. LOL Now - hmmmm...what to do with my time. Yeah, like I don't have anything to do or can't think of anything to do. Think again! There are lots and lots to do.

Monday they were all off to school and I have a meeting tonight. My first day with everyone out of the house for a couple of hours, even my husband. I managed to do 3 loads of laundry, including washing, drying and folding. The kids have to put their clothes away and I put mine and hubbies away. Feed the critters, check a few emails, make coolaid and the rest went by so fast that I just don't remember.
Pick the kids up from school, go over paperwork and so on...
The middle boy actually enjoyed it and was laughing and so on during the ride home from school. He stayed that way all afternoon and really - until bedtime. He fell asleep that way.

I explained (while we were eating dinner) to the boys that I had a meeting and that they were to sit with their dad and read for at least 5 minutes. Once they read then their dad would give them a little poem that I wrote for them. It was kinda like a treasure hunt (which they love). The poem told them to look under their pillow for a bedtime note from me. I knew that I would not be home to tuck them in bed. We started cleaning up from dinner and then we all said our be careful's and our I love you's. Much to my surprise, the youngest one put his arms around my waist and said "I don't want you to go". It was so sweet and of course you know it pulled on my heart.

My husband is wonderful! Have I mentioned that before? Oh yeah - Superman! LOL
He got them all cleaned up, their reading done, took some time with them and into bed. And this is what happened. While my husband was telling them all goodnight, the middle boy (yes the defiant one or most troubled one) got out of bed, put his arms around my husband and said "Goodnight Mr. Gary". Oh I thought my husband was going to cry when he told me about this. Oh shoot - I thought I was going to cry when he told me!

It isn't easy being a parent which I am sure that most of you know that already. And it isn't easy to go from no children to 3 children, pretty much overnight. But let me tell you this...There are moments that have happened since these children have moved into our home that I will cherish for the rest of my life.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

This Was Fun

I belong to several yahoo groups. Mostly WAHM groups, a few craft groups. I love the WAHM groups because they are all so supportive and helpful.

This was fun. What Cartoon Character Are You?

1. Which one of the following describes the perfect date?
..a) Candlelight dinner (4 pts.)
..b) Fun/Theme Park (2 pts.)
..c) Painting in the park (5 pts)
..d) Rock concert (1 pt.)
..e) Going to the movies (3 pts.)

2. What is your favorite type of music?
..a) Rock and Roll (2 pts.)
..b) Alternative (1 pt.)
..c) Soft Rock (4 pts.)
..d) Country (5 pts.)
..e) Pop (3 pts.)

3. What type of movies do you prefer?
..a) Comedy (2 pts.)
..b) Horror (1 pt.)
..c) Musical (3 pts.)
..d) Romance (4 pts.)
..e) Documentary (5 pts.)

4. Which one of these occupations would you choose if you only could choose
One of these?
..a) Waiter (4 pts.)
..b) Professional Sports Player (5 pts.)
..c) Teacher (3 pts.)
..d) Police (2 pts.)
..e) Cashier (1 pt)

5. What do you do with your spare time?
..a) Exercise (5 pts.)
..b) Read (4 pts.)
..c) Watch television (2 pts.)
..d) Listen to music (1 pt.)
..e) Sleep (3 pts.)

6. Which one of the following colors do you like best?
..a) Yellow (1 pt.)
..b) White (5 pts.)
..c) Sky Blue (3 pts.)
..d) Dark Blue (2 pts.)
..e) Red (4 pts.)

7. What do you prefer to eat?
..a) Snow (3 pts.)
..b) Pizza (2 pts.)
..c) Sushi (1 pt.)
..d) Pasta (4 pts.)
..e) Salad (5 pts.)

8. What is your favorite holiday?
..a) Halloween (1 pt.)
..b) Christmas (3 pts.)
..c) New Year (2 pts.)
..d) Valentine's Day (4 pts.)
..e) Thanksgiving (5 pts.)

9. If you could go to one of these places which one would it be?
..a) Paris (4 pts)
..b) Spain (5 pts)
..c) Las Vegas (1 pt)
..d) Hawaii (4 pts)
..e) Hollywood (3 pts)

10. With which of the following would you prefer to spend time with?
..a) Someone Smart (5 pts.)
..b) Someone attractive (2 pts.)
..c) Someone who likes to Party (1 pt.)
..d) Someone who always has fun (3 pts.)
..e) Someone very sentimental (4 pts.)

Now add up your points and find out the answer you have been waiting for!

Very interesting to see "who" your friends are!

(10-16 points) You are Garfield:
You are very comfortable, easy going, and you definitely know how to have fun but sometimes you take it to an extreme. You always know what you are doing and you are always in control of your life. Others may not see things as you do, but that doesn't mean that you always have to do what is right. Try to remember, your happy spirit may hurt you or others.

(17-23 points) You are Snoopy:
You are fun, you are very cool and popular. You always know what's in and you are never are out of style. You are good at knowing how to satisfy everyone else. You have probably disappeared for a few days more than once but you always come home with the family values that you learned Being married and having children are important to you, but only after you have had your share of fun times.

(24-28 points) You are Elmo:
You have lots of friends and you are also popular, always willing to give advice and help out a person in need. You are very optimistic and you always see the bright side of things. Some good advice: try not to be too much of a dreamer. Dreaming too big could cause many conflicts in
your life.

(29-35 points) You are Sponge Bob Square Pants:
You are the classic person that everyone loves. You are the best friend that anyone could ever have and never wants to lose. You never cause harm to anyone and they would never not understand your feelings. Life is a journey, it' s funny and calm for the most part. Stay away from traitors and jealous people, and you will be stress free.

(36-43 points) You are Charlie Brown:
You are tender, you fall in love quickly but you are also very serious about all relationships. You are a family person. You call your Mom every Sunday. You have many friends and may occasionally forget a few birthdays. Don't let your passion confuse you with reality.

(44-50 points) You are Dexter:
You are smart and definitely a thinker... Every situation is fronted with a plan. You have a brilliant mind. You demonstrate very strong family principles. You maintain a stable routine but never ignore a bad situation when it comes. Try to do less over thinking every once in a
while to spice things up a bit with spontaneity!

To My Readers

I love the comments from my readers! I invite anyone and everyone to comment on any of my post. If you have advice, ideas, corrective critisim, blessings or anything that you can think of, please comment.

I invite you to read the comments from other readers. They are wonderful. Thank you all!

Would you like to write for this blog? If you are interested in writting for this blog, please contact me.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Oh My Goodness

Ok, now for the latest updates. Let me start by saying how much I appreciated my parents before and how much more I appreciate my parents now. I love my parents dearly. There really are not enough words for me to express my love, appreciation and respect for my mom and dad. My dad is in heaven and will forever remain in my heart. He was my best friend! My mom is wonderful, she is 70 years old and still so alive. She is very independant and I admire her for every day that she has been in my life.

Now for the Oh My Goodness part!

Tuesday - Off to the foster homes of our 3 boys. We pulled a trailer to pick up anything and everything that they had. Yes I mean everything! It took us half a day to load clothes, toys and well just stuff from 2 foster homes. Of course the wicked foster mom didn't want to cooperate at first. But you probably expected that. But soon enough she just gave in and knew it was over.
With every thing loaded on the trailer we took off down the road. Yes, we kinda looked like the Clampets from the Beverly Hillbillys. I had the kids in the vehicle with me and we followed behind my husband that was pulling the trailer. There were times that he would get ahead of me because of traffic and then we had to catch up. When we did catch up, the kids were so excited and say "There's Superman". As you know, I call my husband Superman. In my cell phone his caller ID is just that "Superman". The kids get a kick out of that.
We all got home safely with giggles pouring out of the boys. My husband and I are exhausted at this point but the boys are all fired up and ready to go. By the end of the day we managed to get the trailer unloaded. Now our living room looks like...hmmmm...well like there was a bomb dropped at the Salvation Army. LOL

Wednesday - Did I mention that the kids had the giggles? Well they did! My husband went to his dad's today to sort through some tools. Just a little inventory that he had to do.
The boys are now doing their own breakfast, which is really wonderful. Up out of bed, breakfast done and a few chores (teeth brushed, bed made, room straightened). We have to go slow. Well I didn't go slow. I tried to do too much with the explosion in my living room. I thought the boys could handle it. The boys wanted to go through all of their things. I wanted them to just start with one box and organize. I had 2 boxes labeled for maybe keep and yard sale. The oldest did really well working this way. The youngest, well he just got tired. But he was a trooper. The middle boy was just...well...defiant. I don't wear any of those he told me. So we had a little discussion about why and so on...One thing lead to another and I became overwhelmed. I really didn't know it then but I sure know it now. I think he managed to keep enough to just get by on.
The oldest was in his room putting things away and straightening everything so I just sent the others out to play. I just gave us all a break from each other and the decision making.

I don't even remember how it happened but somehow they all ended up back inside and under my feet. LOL I love that term. The middle boy got upset and I sent him to his room. On his way to his room he started mouthing and cussing at me. Words that should never come out of an 11 year olds mouth. Words that an 11 year old should never have had used on him. I know where these words came from, they came from the adults that abused him. Not only did the words just fly out of his mouth, but he started hitting his head on the wall and hitting his face with his fist. Ok - the words are just that. They are words. I do not take them personal and they do not offend me. The kid has to vent. Yes, I know that he needs to find other ways to vent and we are working on that with him. But the injuries to himself must be monitored. I would walk in the room and he would stop hurting himself, I would walk out of the room and they began again. It was an awful 15 to 20 minutes! Somehow it seemed like forever. Instead of just sitting in his room, I would take a few clothes or something, just acting like I was straightening things up. Not like I was just spying or watching him.

I felt like things were starting to calm down so I sat down in my recliner in hearing distance of his room. Actually if I were to turn and look over my shoulder I can see in his bedroom. After a few minutes of me trying to keep myself together this is how it went.
him: "Ms Alta"
me: "Yes, (and his name)"
him: "I am really sorry". He has never apologized like this before. NEVER!
me: "Would you like for me to come in your room and us talk about it"
him: "Yes mam".
I went to his room, closed the door and sat on the floor, he was still on his bed. I ask him if he would like to sit on the floor with me. He did! He sat right next to me and leaned a little on me. I put my arm around him and he just started talking. He said that he just thinks about his mom and he gets so mad. Did I mention that he was crying? I have never seen him cry before. And yes, I started crying too. We talked, hugged and cried for about 3 or 4 minutes. Ok, it's over. Done with. No sentences, no restriction...blah, blah, blah. Move on.

Every night when they go to bed we tell them goodnight and sweet dreams. About 2 weeks ago I started saying I love you. I don't expect to hear an I love you too. Not at this point. But that is the last words that I say to them as I am walking out of their rooms. Just kinda leaving them with that. Well - tonight when I told them that this is what I heard from the middle boy..."I love you too Ms Alta". My heart almost stopped! I have heard this every night since then. I don't know what happened, all I know is that something happened. Somehow we broke a barrier.

Thursday - We had a party to go to at the middle boys school that he was leaving. His teacher was great and so were the kids. They all had made him going away cards. They had drawn pictures and put their names on them and some things like "you are my best friend" and so on. It was really nice. We went as a family - all 5 of us - he introduced us all to his friends and said that we are his parents. We had cake and talked as a group and then we went out to the play ground for about 30 minutes. Of course the class had to go back in for their school work and we had to leave. We all had a wonderful time!

Friday - I forgot to mention that Wednesday and Thursday we spent getting the boys registered into their new schools.
Today the oldest boy started school. Can you believe this was my very first time putting a child of mine in school. I thought I was going to cry! He had a great day at school and is very much ready and excited to go back on Monday.
The other 2 boys hung out with me today. We went grocery shopping and they were such a great help. They even shared pushing the buggy and reading from the grocery list. They are learning without even knowing. I love that!

Monday, March 19, 2007

Adoption Update

I will make this a short post for now, but I will update it sometime this week.

WE GOT IT! We got the court order on Monday (late afternoon).

The boys are coming to live in our home on Tuesday!

Excitement is running over at our house.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Fun Days

I love fun days! I have to have at least one fun thing in my day, everyday. No matter if it is the cat sleeping in a silly way, me tripping over the throw rug for the 3rd time in a row or kayaking on the river. Fun Days or fun in our day is important to me and to our family.

Since Spring is in the air and the days grow longer (more daylight) we have more chances to have fun and have fun days.

Today was one of those days. Everyone gets up, eats breakfast, cleans up, straightens up and away we go. Boys out to play, me off to the barn and hubby playing with his toys. Then we head off to the gun range and the boys got to shoot real guns for the very first time. Not only did they get to shoot the guns but they had to sit still and pay attention for about 20 minutes. That 20 minutes was spent on telling and teaching them about guns. Gun safety, eye protection, hearing protection and so on. When a child is interested in something they really will sit still and pay attention.
My husband was wonderful with the boys and I think that he enjoyed it as much as they did. All 3 of the boys got to bring home their targets and the bullets and cartridges that they fired. Those targets, bullets and cartridges will be put in their bedrooms on the wall as a trophy. A reminder that if I try, I can. And the more I do something, the better I get at it.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Working At Home Ramblings and Ideas

Working at home aka WAH. You can add this to it...WAHM. Meaning Work At Home Mom. Now tell me this. What mom doesn't work at home? Gotcha. LOL
My idea on this is "I can do this". I know I can. The first step is to find something that you will actually do. I will do laundry, cook, dishes, garbage, mop, vacuum, sweep, dust, rake the yard, mow the yard...blah, blah, blah... Funny thing is, nobody pays me to do this at home. Hmmm...Am I missing something here? Oh yeah, you mean I gotta do something. LOL

I am a WAHM again. I have been a WAHM off and on for a few years. Am I getting rich? Nope. Do I want to be rich? Nope. Am I making money? Yes. Do I work hard? Don't all mom's work hard? Of course.

If you check out some of my links you will see some of the things that I am doing as a WAHM. I enjoy being home. As a matter of fact - I Love It! As I continue to grow in this adventure, I intend to share. My goal is to grow a little at a time so I don't become overwhelmed and I can still do all of my motherly things and still have a personal life.

Here is one way that I have grown and I am sharing.

The worldwide abstracts site Shvoong invites you to write abstracts of books, articles, newspapers & websites. In return, you will receive royalties for life! Now how hard can that be? Give it a try. Come, read and enjoy! And in the same breath also...Come, write and earn a living!. Shvoong

Time To Plant Grass

It sure is hard not having a tractor. Lucky for us we do have a 4 wheeler. Sounds kinda silly, I know. But sometimes one just has to make do with what they have. And to think, not so long ago there were no tractors and no 4 wheelers. One was considered fortunate if they owned a mule and a plow. Nowdays plowing with a mule is probably considered cruelty to animals. LOL I don't think that it was ever considered cruelty to the farmer to plow with a mule. Funny how things work out.

Today my husband started planting the pasture with grass seed. It is only about a 2 acre pasture. Our country living consist of living in a rural county in a subdivision (used to be all woods) out in the country. We have a total of 4 acres and are very proud of that. Our horses are not kept in a barn so they are on the pasture 24/7. We do have about a 1/2 acres paddock that they are now on, while the pasture grows. I will be able to give them grazing time on the pasture and on the yard. I sure do hope we can get out 40 acres soon.

We have a harrow that goes with our 4 wheeler. That is what we drug the pasture with to make rows (indents) for the seed. The harrow has an aggressive side and a non aggressive side. We covered the seed with the non aggressive side. The boys were really a big help today. I think I had forgotten how dirty that kids can really get. But they are so funny when they look at you with the dirt streaks and the dirt bead necklace and in a very serious way ask a question. It is all I can do to keep from just laughing out loud. I just do my best to not laugh and answer their question.

Now we water, hope for some rain and wait and watch the seed come up. The boys are excited to see the seed grow so that they can see what they have done and the help that they were.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Internet Safety

I found this wonderful link for Internet Safety. It is NetSmartz411.
Any parent that is concerned about the safety of their child on the Internet should really take a look at this site.

NetSmartz411 is parents’ and guardians’ premier, online resource for answering questions about Internet safety, computers, and the Web.

NetSmartz411 is provided at no cost to the public by the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children.

The child you save could be yours.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Not Yet

We are still waiting! Waiting on a Judge to quit playing solitare on his computer and get out Court Order approved so that the boys can be placed in our home. Why do people drag their feet when the quality of life of someone else is in their hands? Oh how it irrates me! LOL

Hopefully, I will be letting everyone know that the day has arrived.

What Will Be Next

Today as my husband was scanning his email and reading the newspaper he said this "If you could make your kids smarter or taller, would you?". He was reading from some advertisement or something on his computer. It was not related to education, it was related to genetic science or genetic engineering .

You can read the article here. The article goes on to explain more.

I am really wondering what will be next. Will we create a "Frankenstein"? Doesn't the world have enough problems now without adding more to them? I cannot figure out why science or scientist have not found ways to cure diseases (problems) instead of creating more problems.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Another Great Weekend

One more wonderful weekend with our adoptive siblings. This weekend really has been a positive one. The boys are starting to take the bull by the horns...By this I mean that they are starting to do things without being told. They are learning how our house is run and how we all work together as a team...As a family.

This was one of the weekends that my husband had to work and I had the boys all to my self. We are learning how they interact with us as individual parents. We are really learning a lot. Not just the boys, but me and my husband. I am sure that there will be tough times, but the good times must out number the tough times.

We spent the day at home on Saturday, just playing outside. We have a large round trough we bought to use as a swimming pool. I think we used it once last summer. The kids filled it with water and played in it for about 3 hours. They could get as dirty as they wanted to and just run and jump in it. It was great.

Sunday we went to the springs. The springs is a nice 72 degrees year round. Of course the kids wanted to swim. And so they did. LOL They also shivered. And shivered some more. Oh I'm not cold they would say. Yeah, sure you're not cold, then why are you shivering. The best part is that they loved it. We had a picnic lunch and sat and talked and laughed.

If only the paperwork would hurry up and go through. The paperwork to get them placed in the home. All of us are just waiting on the phone to ring and it be our case worker saying that everything is as it should be and the kids can move in. It will happen, I know it will. And it will happen this month.

Excitement is abundant at our house.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Busy Busy Busy

Needless to say that I have been busy! LOL
I cannot believe that it has been so long since I posted. I have been slacking. Shame on me.

Ok - now for the most recent updates on the boys!

This month they are going to be placed in our home! Yes - this month. We are all so excited! We don't have a definate date yet, but we do know that it will be by the end of March.

On the 23rd of February, I picked the middle boy up by himself. My husband had to work, so we got to spend the weekend together. We had a really great weekend together. Getting him by himself was a great idea that myself, my husband and the case worker came up with. He is the one that has the most challenges and the one that needs the most one on one time.

From now until they are placed in the home we are getting them every weekend. We really are moving forward with this and did I mention that we are excited.

What happens from here?
We pick them up every weekend and they have their weekend stayover. I said that they will be placed in the home this month. Once they are placed in our home, there will be a 90 day period for us and the boys to get to know each other much, much better. Going through our daily routines will certainly help all of us learn more about each other.
The 90 day period is to make sure that all of us want to continue with the adoption. The boys also get to give their opinion and feelings about us adopting them. Right now they are all for it and so are we.
Once the 90 day period is over, all 5 of us will go before a Judge. The Judge will ask us all some questions to help determine if we are all ready for the adoption to be final.
That is pretty much all I know at this point. Once it all happens, I will be able to fill in the blanks.